Have you been running away from love?
Really, who doesn’t want to fall in love?
Growing up, the biggest dreams of all the kids I knew were getting a lucrative job and finding the right partner to spend the rest of their lives with.
These dreams, fuelled by the cartoons and movies we watched, were our cardinal goals in Life.
The funny thing is, finding the right person to love is still one of our biggest dreams.
I think it is alright to conclude that wanting to be loved and to love is a universal desire of humans.
Ooh, now, you are wondering, “Am I weird because I don’t feel this way?”.
No, you are not.
It is possible that you may find yourself running away from love because you are afraid of getting hurt.
This fear of hurt may be a product of your relationships in the past, and it is normal to want to protect yourself from further hurt.
However, this fear of getting hurt may cause you to miss out on good relationships and all the benefits that come with them.
Any healthy relationship is built on trust.
If your relationship is built on fear of being hurt by your partner, it won’t last.
If you are in such a state, you need to pause and reassess the situation to know the way forward.
This article will help you diagnose your state by listing the potential signs you may exhibit if you are running from love.
Knowing the signs is a step towards doing something about it!
7 Clear Signs You Are Running Away From Love
1. When you like someone, you tend to seek out their flaws
Love can be an overwhelming emotion that comes with different sides and shades.
When you like someone, it can be natural to want to find a flaw that will make them seem less desirable as a defence to protecting yourself.
Anything to justify squashing the feelings growing inside you.
If you don’t see any red flags, you shouldn’t go around searching for them.
If you start searching for flaws, you may end up imagining some flaws just to justify running away from the person you are starting to love.
If you do this, it is one of the big signs that you are running away from love.
2. You find it hard to admit that you like someone
Another sign that you are running away from love is when you find it hard to admit that you like someone.
It can be scary to let yourself feel things for someone else, especially if it’s been a while since you’ve had any strong feelings of love and affection.
If your past experiences with love have caused pain, then it’s understandable why you might find it hard to admit that you like someone.
When I was younger, I would avoid saying that I like someone because I was scared of rejection, but I never denied it to myself.
If you find yourself denying your feelings to yourself, it is one of the signs that you are running from love.
You probably think that the jinx is in admitting that you like someone, and the moment you do, everything falls apart.
3. You find it difficult to commit to a relationship
If it gets very hard to commit yourself to a relationship, it may be because you are running from love.
When you begin to say things like, “I like to keep my options open”, it is a sign that you are probably afraid to dedicate yourself to a relationship.
You may do this because you are scared.
Scared of feeling empty without them.
Scared of feeling broken without them.
So, you proceed to build a wall around yourself with your other ‘options’, which may actually be non-existent.
4. You tell people you are not searching for a relationship
This is basically a sort of defence mechanism.
You don’t want to set yourself up for disappointment or hurt so you start telling people that you’re not looking for a long-term relationship.
Deep down, this is a way of protecting yourself from the fear of love and heartache.
But it’s okay to feel scared sometimes; human emotions can be complex.
You may call it “defining the relationship”, but it is actually your way of trying to prepare yourself for when the relationship ends.
You may actually think you don’t want a relationship, and that’s fine.
However, when you meet that person that makes you question the reasons why you made that decision, don’t hold back.
Worrying about how a relationship ends before it even begins is a sign that you are running away from love.
5. You prefer casual flings with people you have no interest in
You may think that casual flings are a safer bet when it comes to relationships and that it is easier to “protect” yourself from heartache.
I have heard many people say there is a kind of security in having casual hookups with people who are not emotionally attached to you.
I totally get the reason behind this.
But in reality, these kinds of relationships can end up hurting you even more.
By not giving yourself the chance to get to know someone on a deeper level and form a bond with them, you are missing out on an opportunity for growth and understanding yourself better.
If you are exhibiting this sign, it is surely because you are either consciously or unconsciously running from away love.
6. You panic when they express their feelings for you
If you find yourself feeling panicky and uncomfortable when someone expresses their feelings for you, it may be a sign that you are scared of love.
I term it being allergic to expressions of love.
You shouldn’t be afraid to communicate and express those feelings with someone you find yourself comfortable enough to love.
When they admit those feelings to you, they are actually admitting their vulnerability to you, and the least you can do is to reciprocate.
You may be subconsciously aware of the fact that if you let them in, your life is going to change dramatically and become much more complicated.
At this point, it would be helpful to ask yourself why you are so afraid.
Are you scared of being hurt or disappointed?
Do you feel like you will be expected to reciprocate feelings that you do not have?
If you notice that panic begins growing within you when the person you are dating expresses the extent of their feelings to you, you are avoiding love.
The fact is, you are not allergic to feelings; you just don’t like hearing them expressed because they trigger unpleasant memories of the past.
7. When the relationship ends, you try to convince yourself that you felt nothing for them
Relationships do not last forever, most of the time.
When it ends, it is important that partners can exit the relationship agreeing that while they felt something for each other, the relationship just wasn’t meant to be.
However, if you find yourself denying everything you felt because of a relationship that ended, it may be a sign that you are running away from love.
One of the cardinal rules of running from love is; Never admit that you can feel it.
Not acknowledging your true feelings only creates more walls around you.
Walling yourself in from the world won’t help you get over the hurt.
Openly admitting your feelings may be the first step toward healing.
Final words
When finding love becomes insignificant to you, it is a sign that you are running away from love.
You may not be doing it consciously but the fact still stands.
You are probably wondering what to do.
Start with admitting your feelings to yourself very clearly.
Then, try admitting it to friends and finally, to the person you love.
These signs above can be corrected and if you notice you are displaying any of them, you must deliberately make an effort to change.
Love is a great ride when you find the right person to share it with.
Don’t miss out on this feeling!